his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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