Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry ghengis_mcbangus hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(360): View more from Washington

Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.

Fav 26 6564 972
share tweet
(440): View more from Ohio

I just did the classiest thing ever.

(216): View more from Ohio

last time you said that you got chlamydia.

Fav 19 1918 6832
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(229): View more from Georgia

He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.

Fav 41 9433 1421
share tweet
(304): View more from West Virginia

You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.

Fav 24 9640 2726
share tweet
(513): View more from Ohio

So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.

Fav 19 6245 1283
share tweet
(805): View more from California

the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.

Fav 21 7588 2018
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(516): View more from New York

That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.

(1-516): View more from New York

yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.

(516): View more from New York

Do you have to put it that way?

Fav 21 6622 1328
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(614): View more from Ohio

Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.

Fav 1 642 369
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(704): View more from North Carolina

Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun

Fav 0 15 56
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT