when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
You're a waste of cheezeits
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize