her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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