Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize