I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Randomize
