I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize