i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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