i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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