So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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