Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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