TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
high people should be assigned attendants
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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