i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Randomize
