in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize