Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
