we have pet lesbian snakes
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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