it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
