Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
