he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
