You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
