Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
