U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
