Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
