i already hear my dad disowning me
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
