Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
