I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
