having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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