remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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