So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
