I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize