if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
