my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
its not stalking. its research.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
