So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
