My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
