OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
