Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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