You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
