Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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