after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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