matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
