Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'd cum for enchiladas.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
