I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
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