After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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