So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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