He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Randomize
