Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize