just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Randomize
