so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
