I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
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