her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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