hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
